Purple Orange Juice Funny Windows Errors
| I really really wanted to try to write something funny, but I realize that I'm going to sound like an old guy trying too hard. This is lightweight funny, at least they're throwing the event in the Bay for all those who don't want to move to the hecka cutty city of Seattle, yadadamean? I hope they're slappin some P-Lo, good for giggin off some drank. But hey, at least it's AOB, the interns ain't gotta pay, right? And oh yea, about drank. As someone below said, it can also mean drink. Think 'finna', just a bastardization of fitting to. I distinctly remember going to some comedy club with a 2 drink minimum and some ladies showed up late, demanding "I want my mothafuckin drank!" | |
| Last edited by kundalini_kid on Wed Jul 06, 2016 5:49 pm |
| The Ars writers may be too old to know about this, but drank can, and typically does refer to a drink. Example: "Orange Drank" and "Purple Drank". Typically these are uncarbonated sweet drinks. Dave Chappelle explains it well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UayQTu2kH-U | |
| Last edited by SgtCupCake on Wed Jul 06, 2016 5:47 pm |
| Quote: It is unlikely that Microsoft will be offering drank at its party. I wouldn't be too sure about that; they did buy LinkedIn for $26 billion recently, after all. |
| Quote: The email was poorly worded and not in keeping with our values as a company. We are looking into how this occurred and will take appropriate steps to address it. Agreed. You'd rather have the poorly worded word-salad from a few years ago. Does no one at Microsoft know how to release a statement to the public? Microsoft: Work for us. PLEEAASSEEE! |
| Full circle if it turns out this was written by an intern in their recruiting department. And if it wasn't I bet they blame it on one anyway |
| As anyone who has a current linkedin profile can tell you, recruiters will adopt any tactic to bring in candidates, no matter how desperate. This sort of thing doesn't surprise me. What's your answer, now? |
| Please, please, please, tell me Kim from Microsoft (if she really exists) got fired for this. |
| It might have worked fine if they had Cortana send a video instead. Of course, the eternally nude Cortana saying those lines would be hilarious. Soon to be on Youtube no doubt. |
| The Ars writers may be too old to know about this, but drank can, and typically does refer to a drink. Example: "Orange Drank" and "Purple Drank". Typically these are uncarbonated sweet drinks. Dave Chappelle explains it well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UayQTu2kH-U He is discussing purple drink ("Grape" Kool-aid or Flavor Aid, stuff with no fruit juice), not purple drank, which is as Peter described it. Furthermore, orange drink is the FDA required name for orange colored/flavored items that have little to no orange juice. That is, "drink" is for things not good enough to be called "juice". | |
| Last edited by Rosyna on Wed Jul 06, 2016 6:02 pm |
| Hilarious! Cringe-worthy lingo and widespread misuse thereof aside, how the fuck does somebody working in corporate recruitment not know where their employer is headquartered? Now add to that the fact that MS' headquarter location is widely known to just about anybody who read the news (not even tech news) in the last few decades, and it looks like MS either has no hiring standards, or works with really shitty contractors. |
| So much for another Microsoft AI I'm also wondering if they tried to give that Twitter AI bot a second chance... |
| Now I'm trying to imagine how an Oracle recruitment email would read. joooiiiin us... |
| Now I'm trying to imagine how an Oracle recruitment email would read. Something like this. Greetings, fellow human! Do you wish to subjugate the masses? Do you have any experience with being pedantically and excessively litigious? Do you fantasize about our glorious CEO, Larry Page? Have you ever masturbated while strangling a kitten? If so, you should consider a career with Oracle! Our wages aren't provably illegal and our job benefits arguably exist. Employment with Oracle has not been demonstrated to be worse than homelessness. It is exciting to be part of such a terrible machine! -The Oracle Recruitment Team, Who Are Totally Also Humans We Swear |
| They should have just used the 80s rap https://youtu.be/noEHHB6rnMI . Go to 8:13 |
| The Ars writers may be too old to know about this, but drank can, and typically does refer to a drink. Example: "Orange Drank" and "Purple Drank". Typically these are uncarbonated sweet drinks. Dave Chappelle explains it well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UayQTu2kH-U He is discussing purple drink ("Grape" Kool-aid or Flavor Aid, stuff with no fruit juice), not purple drank, which is as Peter described it. Furthermore, orange drink is the FDA required name for orange colored/flavored items that have little to no orange juice. That is, "drink" is for things not good enough to be called "juice". I feel like I'm reading this in some sort of warped reality. There is nothing more akin to wearing Sansabelt slacks and yelling at the kids in the lawn than attempting to explain the meaning of popular teen lingo using references. The fact is that kids use "drank" to refer to pretty much anything that can be consumed by the act of drinking. At one point, someone did put a reference on Urban Dictionary about the use of codeine based cough syrup, but the first time you try correcting a kid who uses the term "improperly," and you will receive that look that tells you quite clearly that you are clearly out of touch with current youth reality. Based on the fact that you penned such a well researched rebuttal to the broader use of drank, I'm going to assume that your interactions with today's youth has not actually involved said youth. |
| no matter how young i was I never wanted this from a prospective employer. getting a job during the internet boom i became very suspicious of "fun times" and pool tables. |
| Now I'm trying to imagine how an Oracle recruitment email would read. Something like this. Greetings, fellow human! Do you wish to subjugate the masses? Do you have any experience with being pedantically and excessively litigious? Do you fantasize about our glorious CEO, Larry Page? Have you ever masturbated while strangling a kitten? If so, you should consider a career with Oracle! Our wages aren't provably illegal and our job benefits arguably exist. Employment with Oracle has not been demonstrated to be worse than homelessness. It is exciting to be part of such a terrible machine! -The Oracle Recruitment Team, Who Are Totally Also Humans We Swear I was going to post something like this, but I like yours better anyway. |
| hella dank Oh shit! It's dat boi! |
| The Ars writers may be too old to know about this, but drank can, and typically does refer to a drink. Example: "Orange Drank" and "Purple Drank". Typically these are uncarbonated sweet drinks. Dave Chappelle explains it well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UayQTu2kH-U He is discussing purple drink ("Grape" Kool-aid or Flavor Aid, stuff with no fruit juice), not purple drank, which is as Peter described it. Furthermore, orange drink is the FDA required name for orange colored/flavored items that have little to no orange juice. That is, "drink" is for things not good enough to be called "juice". I feel like I'm reading this in some sort of warped reality. There is nothing more akin to wearing Sansabelt slacks and yelling at the kids in the lawn than attempting to explain the meaning of popular teen lingo using references. The fact is that kids use "drank" to refer to pretty much anything that can be consumed by the act of drinking. At one point, someone did put a reference on Urban Dictionary about the use of codeine based cough syrup, but the first time you try correcting a kid who uses the term "improperly," and you will receive that look that tells you quite clearly that you are clearly out of touch with current youth reality. Based on the fact that you penned such a well researched rebuttal to the broader use of drank, I'm going to assume that your interactions with today's youth has not actually involved said youth. I was responding to the incorrect assessment of Dave Chappelle's comedy routine. Irregardless, as far as I am aware, Chappelle is not a teenager. | |
| Last edited by Rosyna on Wed Jul 06, 2016 6:35 pm |
| I'm 25 and I only understood the core of that e-mail. |
| I thought they'd fired the guy who organized that GDC party. Sounds like the same game plan. |
| See, here I was thinking that "buy you a drank" was just a hip hop way of saying "buy you a drink". But then I went and looked up the lyrics to T-Pain's "Buy you a drank", and find: Quote: Snap ya fingers, do the step, you can do it all by yourself Followed by Quote: I'm a buy you a drank (Then I'm a take you home with me) So then I have to go watch the youtube video. And now, I'm no closer to any sort of understanding, and I have lost 15 minutes. I think I need a dr[i/a]nk. |
| Now I'm trying to imagine how an Oracle recruitment email would read. Dear Sir or Madam, Oracle Corp. is seeking new counsel following the outcome of recent litigation. Our senior management would like to consult with your firm at the earliest opportunity. Sincerely, Dorian Daley. |
| So obviously HR has developed a bot that can actually speak to the millennials. Amazing times we live in! It's good to see Tay working again. Sad to see that Tay is working about as well as it did before... |
| hella dank Oh shit! It's dat boi! More like Memecrosoft, am I right? |
| Honestly it's pretty easy to judge the a company by how they advertise themselves to prospective employees. At my school's career fair, the booths for Red Hat, SAS, EMC, and Oracle were right next to each other. The posters for Red Hat and SAS had pictures of people on them, the posters for EMC and Oracle were covered in a "word cloud" of meaningless tech buzzwords. It was pretty funny, actually. |
| Sadly the MS recruiters are probably 12 years old or maybe 24 going on 12. |
| So I think we've established that if 'party A' says "drank" and 'party B' fails to understand their exact meaning in context then either 'party A', or 'party B', or both are old? |
| Yo bitchezz. Come to work for Microsoft and get your down lows on the upside with bling and perks. 7:00 pm, orientation. Fo shore! |
| Now I'm trying to imagine how an Oracle recruitment email would read. Something like this. Greetings, fellow human! Do you wish to subjugate the masses? Do you have any experience with being pedantically and excessively litigious? Do you fantasize about our glorious CEO, Larry Page? Have you ever masturbated while strangling a kitten? If so, you should consider a career with Oracle! Our wages aren't provably illegal and our job benefits arguably exist. Employment with Oracle has not been demonstrated to be worse than homelessness. It is exciting to be part of such a terrible machine! -The Oracle Recruitment Team, Who Are Totally Also Humans We Swear Um, Larry Page is the CEO of Google or Alphabet or whatever, Larry Ellison is the CEO of Oracle. I think both will be highly offended by your error but they're both scumbags, sleazeballs, & douches regardless. |
| Quote: The email was poorly worded and not in keeping with our values as a company. We are looking into how this occurred and will take appropriate steps to address it. - Hey, John, open the apology template and send to this list of addresses. |
| Ahh, this is the classic Microsoft I remember. Welcome back old friend. Welcome back. Just don't start with Active X again. |
| Highlight of the event will be Nadella prancing about on stage in a sweat-stained shirt bellowing, "INTERNS! INTERNS! INTERNS! INTERNS! INTERNS! INTERNS!…" FTFY: CHEAP LABOR, CHEAP LABOR, CHEAP LABOR, CHEAP LABOR (even cheaper than H1Bs (no snitch'in))! |
| The only rational explanation (as in Microsoft did something rational here) is that MS is using this email to cross responders off the list of potential recruits and will be sending out the real invitation for real jobs to people who identified the first letter as a moronic prank and didn't respond. The new letter will be worded as follows: Quote: Greetings Bay Area Interns: Microsoft University Recruiting will be sending a team to the bay area to meet with Bay Area interns at the Microsoft Bay Area Meet-And-Greet on July 12. This event is for Microsoft interns only at our San Francisco office at 6-8 PM. Please print a copy of this email as this will serve as your invitation; alternatively, you may save this email and bring it on your mobile device. Food and drinks will be served. We are looking forward to meeting you. Kim Kimslastname |
| Reminds me of my former company's controller (middle-aged white woman) who suddenly developed the urge to spout hip-hop vernacular at inappropriate moments. The most amusing was her indiscriminate use of "baby daddy" when referring to male coworkers in her department. This led some to assume that she was having numerous affairs. No matter how many times we tried to set her straight, she kept doing it. As far as I know, she's still doing it. Well, you go, girl. |
| Groovy, man, groovy. I'll translate, I can speak Jive |
| I'm 25 and I only understood the core of that e-mail. I suspect they've lifted words from a very specific youth subculture or from a specific geographic area. I barely recognise anything from that email. |
| Now I'm trying to imagine how an Oracle recruitment email would read. Something like this. Greetings, fellow human! Do you wish to subjugate the masses? Do you have any experience with being pedantically and excessively litigious? Do you fantasize about our glorious CEO, Larry Page? Have you ever masturbated while strangling a kitten? If so, you should consider a career with Oracle! Our wages aren't provably illegal and our job benefits arguably exist. Employment with Oracle has not been demonstrated to be worse than homelessness. It is exciting to be part of such a terrible machine! -The Oracle Recruitment Team, Who Are Totally Also Humans We Swear Um, Larry Page is the CEO of Google or Alphabet or whatever, Larry Ellison is the CEO of Oracle. I think both will be highly offended by your error but they're both scumbags, sleazeballs, & douches regardless. That's just the kind of whacky guy HR-bot-8739 is. Their immediate re-indoctrination is currently underway. Anyway, you should consider working here at Oracle, where we are all totally human, and not a bunch of alien-controlled androids who want to use your organs for spare parts. Our workplace was recently rated almost 100% human sacrifice free! So come, pledge your fealty to our lord Ellison (praise Him!), and partake of our most virtuous benefits package (praise His bounty!). |
| I'm 25 and I only understood the core of that e-mail. I suspect they've lifted words from a very specific youth subculture or from a specific geographic area. I barely recognise anything from that email. Specific subculture, and not one they want to be recruiting, IMO. |
jacksontreadevent77.blogspot.com
Source: https://arstechnica.com/civis/viewtopic.php?p=31498273
0 Response to "Purple Orange Juice Funny Windows Errors"
Post a Comment